Tuesday, November 21, 2006

Perchance to Dream

"That he's mad, 'tis true, 'tis true 'tis pity,
And pity 'tis 'tis true."

--From Hamlet

Eddie called me up to say goodbye. Goodbye? Wherever are you going? That's what I asked. It turned out that he and some friends were driving to Virginia where they were going to skydive -- his very first time. His father had tried to lure him away from this folly. Money. A trip to Europe. A tantrum. A faked heart attack. Nothing swayed Eddie. He was going to throw himself from a plane while attached to an experienced jumper. So he was saying goodbye to me...in case, you know?

ALICE: Well, Eddie, you have called me before...when you were going bungee jumping, when you were going to run with the bulls in Pamplona, when you were going spelunking, and when you were going to learn how to scuba dive in Egypt. When does this end?
EDDIE: Don't worry, I thought long and hard about this and I had a plan to back out of it, if I needed to do that.
ALICE: What plan?
EDDIE: Well, when I went to sleep last night I promised myself that if I had a dream of Calpurnia urging Caesar to stay away from the Curia, then I wouldn't go.
ALICE: THAT was your plan?
EDDIE: Yes, because had Caesar listened to the little woman, he wouldn't have been stabbed all those times. He should've listened.
ALICE: THAT was your plan?
EDDIE: Yes. But, I didn't have that dream, so here I go. And it isn't March 15th so that's good, too, right?
ALICE: What does your girlfriend have to say about this?
EDDIE: Oh, she's right here! She's doing this too.
GIRLFRIEND: Hi! Isn't this exciting?
ALICE: Incredibly. Did you also have an "exit" plan for this outing?
GIRLFRIEND: Oh, yes! You know that pillow crease on the cheek that one wakes up with some mornings?
ALICE: Uh, yeah.
GIRLFRIEND: Well, if I woke up with one today, then I would have insisted that Eddie and I stay home.
ALICE: THAT was your plan?
GIRLFRIEND: Yeah, because every time I wake up with that line on my face, something bad happens to me.

So unlined Girlfriend and Calpurnia-free Eddie jumped, and lived to tell the tale.


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