Friday, December 18, 2009

Sassy Love



A family is a unit composed not only of children but of men, women, an occasional animal, and the common cold. ~Ogden Nash



Harry has lived in New York for several years now, and planned to visit his parents in Arkansas for one week during the holiday season. He does not go home that often because he is miffed at his mother -- for many reasons, though one in particular rankles him the most. Harry is the youngest of four boys, and when he left home to find fame in New York theater, his mother replaced him with a squirrel.



Yes. That's correct. Sassy the Squirrel now has the run of Harry's childhood home in Little Rock. A year ago, his mother found the baby squirrel lying injured and abandoned in their backyard and nursed it back to health. Now, she is a coddled member of the family.

Sassy sits at the head of the table and nibbles on peanuts while the others eat dinner. At night she sleeps in a towel-lined basket in what was once Harry’s bedroom.

Not surprisingly, Harry’s two best friends in New York laughed at his tale of woe but tried to help him the only way they knew. They took him to a bar.

“Is your little sister cute?” This from Mikey, who grinned when Pete sprayed beer with his shout of laughter.

“Does she say cheese for the camera at family pictures? Or acorn?”

Harry ordered another round. “Not helping, you guys. That rodent should hunt for things in the woods and sleep in a damn tree!”

The bartender brought the drinks and leaned over the bar. “Whatcha buying her for Christmas?”

Mikey and Pete sprayed more beer.

Harry left New York several days later. His friends called and wished him a “happy holiday at Sassy's house.” They also reminded him that he should be polite once there because, after all, when he finally came out to his family, the one member that took it in stride right away was...

Well, you know.

Harry will stay in the guest bedroom. As he found out the last time he was home, Sassy prefers to sleep alone.

106 comments:

  1. Great twist, Marisa! Symbolism everywhere in this piece - even in the picture ;o)

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  2. Fun story! I loved the last line. Perfect sum up. :)

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  3. Nice one,M! Now I have to read your other stories....

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  4. Hilarious, especially the last line.

    I loved this too: "a coddled member of the family".

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  5. hmm, when i left home my mom left everything just the way it was..for 30 yrs! No squirrels..fun tale, tail you know what I mean..

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  6. Marisa ... I almost chocked on a tomato slice when I read he'd been replaced with a squirrel.. The story is wonderfully happy... Thanks for sharing.

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  7. Zeitgeist or something about the going home for holidays air? My fridayflash is also about the substituting of a family member by an animal.

    Great minds and all that!

    Hugely enjoyable

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  8. It's true, us nurturers (is that even a word?)do tend to replace the child that goes off on their own with a pet. Or in my case, another child :-) Fun story!

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  9. Marisa,
    I absolutely cracked up when you said he was replaced by a squirrel. I was replaced by a dog, a more logical choice. I love the squirrel idea, because it says more about what his mom was missing when he left home. Oh the craziness that would ensue!

    Thanks for this funny Christmas story. Should give those going home for Christmas something to think about;))

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  10. lol.
    I'd be pissed.

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  11. Fun. Nothing like having to sleep in the guest room due to a squirrel. Love the picture.

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  12. I LOVE it. Almost choked on my coffee when I read he'd been replaced by a squirrel. The ending is perfect, nice play on words--and I agree that there is symbolism everywhere in this piece. So much in so few words!

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  13. HA! What a fun story Marisa. Great little twists everywhere.
    Thanks for sharing the laughs!

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  14. A fun story, full of humor and great writing throughout. Couldn't help but think of the Seinfeld episode where George had to buy the tiny instruments so the squirrel he ran over could be surgically repaired.

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  15. :) I also though of that Seinfeld episode while reading.
    Very nice story, Marisa! And great photo :)

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  16. What a fun story!

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  17. I liked it. :) I had to think that this could be turned into a thriller story where the neglected son conspires to "take the squirrel out of the picture...permanently"...but that's just me being silly I guess.

    Nice one.

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  18. I hate when that happens!
    Can't wait 'til the kids move out...

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  19. How fun, Marisa! Great comic moments in this. Loved the last line.

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  20. Excellent story. Had me laughing out loud. I'm sure there's a ton of baby talk at the squirrel, too. A day in the life in that house would make a great story, too.

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  21. Anonymous8:17 AM

    LOL great to read. loved the twist. :)

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  22. A squirrel! Call the dogs!!

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  23. Marisa,

    This helps to explain the seven mice I've been feeding.
    Gives new meaning to the term "empty nest!"
    I absolutely loved it!

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  24. Anonymous4:37 PM

    I think I know this family. I think I'm a MEMBER of this family. I've never been fond of squirrels -- tree rats, I say -- but it wouldn't surprise me one bit to find my mother had years ago replaced me with one. :)

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  25. Yuck, I would never sleep with a squirrel, especially one named Sassy. The nerve!

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  26. I am very fond of squirrels. I enjoyed this immensely.
    I could just picture her sitting at the family table.
    very nicely done.
    :0)

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  27. This was super fun, and beautifully written!

    Your story brings me back to when I left home for my first job in Boston. Upon my return for Christmas, I found I'd been usurped by a short-haired wire fox terrier. He sat at my seat at the kitchen table (yes!) -- I was told to get another chair from the dining room. He was a great pooch... Peace, Linda

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  28. I think you have the makings of a blockbuster Disney movie here. Cute story.

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  29. Very fun story and I love why they encouraged him to be nice to the squirrel ... very cute and nice, creative thinking!

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  30. What a fun read (and very realistic friends!)
    The last line was great :)

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  31. This was excellent. Humor, twist, double meanings ~ made me want to reread it again!

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  32. Poor Harry! So glad all my mom did was turn my room into her sewing room. Very cute. :)

    Cecilia

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  33. Blimey, that must cause some kind of traumatic personality. Replaced by a squirrel!

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